Life Takes You On A Constant && Consistent ROLLERCOASTER. It Offers Straight Rides, Curves, Twists, Turns, Upside-Downs, Tilts. But It's Always, EVENTUALLY, Supposed To Straighten Out...In Order To Get Off. But Unlike Rollercoasters, You Never Know If && When You'll Finally Be Able To Get Off. Just EVENTUALLY.
There's Times In Life Where You Find Out So Much About Yourself In Such A Short Amount Of Time, That It's...OVERWHELMING. There Also Comes Those Times In Life Where You Find Out More About Others. More Than You Would Like To Have Learned, &&It's Nothing Far From...Hurtful. But Enlightening.
Being 18, At This Point Of My Life, && In College...Is An Experience. A HARD One, To Say The Least. && The Necessary 'Finding Who You Are' And The Mistake Of 'FORGETTING Who You Are' Collide In Ways That You Wouldn't Imagine. But Subconsciously, You Know The Concepts Are Present.
At Howard (And Any Other HBCU), Finding Who You Are Can Be Positive Or Negative. It Can Make You Happy Or Upset You. I've Had The Luxury Of Having And Feeling Both Ways.
People's Minds And Concepts Of Things Here Are So...Excuse The Language...FXCKED UP. But On A Non-Personal && Universal Focus, Basically, Black On Black Racism FURTHER Exceeds Black On White Racism. And It's Truly SAD && DISHEARTENING. In A World Where Everything Is Based On Survival Of The Fittest, It's DISGUSTING To Have To Defend Yourself WITHIN Your Own Race. Here, You Have Others Of Your Same Race, At A Place That's SUPPOSED To Be About Black Scholarship && Empowering The Young Black Community, Degrading One Another. You Have Beauty Being Defined As Everything OTHER Than What It Should Be Defined As. My Generation Can't Be Anything But Disappointing To Those Before Us. We Take Everything Positive And Find Some Way Of Bringing Out A Negativity In It. I Love This Life And Time I Live In...But It's FAR From Admirable.
On The Other Side Of Things, 'Forgetting Who You Are' Is So Easy. Through 'Finding Who You Are', You Tend To Forget About Everything Old, Because Your Mind Is Clogged With Everything New, That You...CONFORM To Everything You Find Out About Yourself As It Comes Along; Throwing Away Everything Old; Even Those Little Old Things That Made And Continue To Make You YOU. With Throwing Away The Old, And Conforming To The New, You 'Forget Who You Are'. &&With That, You 'Forget WHO Contributed To Making You Who You Are'. In Common Terms, You Begin Acting "Brand New".
There's Nothing Wrong With Changing. But There Can Always, However, Be Something Wrong With The Way In Which You Do So. Change Is Inevitable. And While Conformity Is Inevitable, Too, It's Far From Logical. I've, Recently, Had The Pleasure Of Witnessing This Change (Or More So, Conformity) In Certain People; Where They've COMPLETELY Lost Sight Of Who They Are, && Have Instead Focused On Who They WANT To Be. They've COMPLETELY Forgotten About Those Who've Helped Them Grow. Who've Supported Them. Who've Had Their Back.
So, My Words To Them: You've Officially Burned The Bridge That Led To Me, My Friendship, And My Support. You Reap What You Sow. And Anybody Else Who Has Witnessed This, I Encourage You To Say The Same To Those Who've "Forgotten" About You.
You Live Life With A Purpose. You Live Life To Be A Positive Attribute To Your Family, Your Community, YOUR World. You Live Life To ENCOURAGE, Not Degrade. To APPRECIATE. You Experience Life With Those That Are Deserving Of Sharing This Gift Of Life With You. Those That Aren't Are Meant To Live Their Life Without The Gift Of YOU.
I Close This In Saying, I've Come To This Realization Of Who I Am. My Growth Is Far From Done, And My Learning Continues. But Some Things I've Learned Thus Far Are:
1. I Can't Be Concerned With Others And What They're Doing With Their Lives. Nor SHOULD Others Be Concerned With Mine.
2. Beauty Is The Exact Opposite Of What Is Defined As Today. ESPECIALLY, Here At Howard University.
3. Those That Don't Appreciate Me, Don't DESERVE Me. Thus, A Farewell To All Things Between Me And Those Persons, Past And Present, Is Necessary.
4. Remember Who And What I Was RAISED To Be. Remember The Values Instilled IN Me.
5. That I Am Deserving. And OTHERS Are As Well.
I Wish That Others My Age Would Realize The Same...And Especially The Latter.
Forever Changing,
Chardae` A. Williams
There's Times In Life Where You Find Out So Much About Yourself In Such A Short Amount Of Time, That It's...OVERWHELMING. There Also Comes Those Times In Life Where You Find Out More About Others. More Than You Would Like To Have Learned, &&It's Nothing Far From...Hurtful. But Enlightening.
Being 18, At This Point Of My Life, && In College...Is An Experience. A HARD One, To Say The Least. && The Necessary 'Finding Who You Are' And The Mistake Of 'FORGETTING Who You Are' Collide In Ways That You Wouldn't Imagine. But Subconsciously, You Know The Concepts Are Present.
At Howard (And Any Other HBCU), Finding Who You Are Can Be Positive Or Negative. It Can Make You Happy Or Upset You. I've Had The Luxury Of Having And Feeling Both Ways.
People's Minds And Concepts Of Things Here Are So...Excuse The Language...FXCKED UP. But On A Non-Personal && Universal Focus, Basically, Black On Black Racism FURTHER Exceeds Black On White Racism. And It's Truly SAD && DISHEARTENING. In A World Where Everything Is Based On Survival Of The Fittest, It's DISGUSTING To Have To Defend Yourself WITHIN Your Own Race. Here, You Have Others Of Your Same Race, At A Place That's SUPPOSED To Be About Black Scholarship && Empowering The Young Black Community, Degrading One Another. You Have Beauty Being Defined As Everything OTHER Than What It Should Be Defined As. My Generation Can't Be Anything But Disappointing To Those Before Us. We Take Everything Positive And Find Some Way Of Bringing Out A Negativity In It. I Love This Life And Time I Live In...But It's FAR From Admirable.
On The Other Side Of Things, 'Forgetting Who You Are' Is So Easy. Through 'Finding Who You Are', You Tend To Forget About Everything Old, Because Your Mind Is Clogged With Everything New, That You...CONFORM To Everything You Find Out About Yourself As It Comes Along; Throwing Away Everything Old; Even Those Little Old Things That Made And Continue To Make You YOU. With Throwing Away The Old, And Conforming To The New, You 'Forget Who You Are'. &&With That, You 'Forget WHO Contributed To Making You Who You Are'. In Common Terms, You Begin Acting "Brand New".
There's Nothing Wrong With Changing. But There Can Always, However, Be Something Wrong With The Way In Which You Do So. Change Is Inevitable. And While Conformity Is Inevitable, Too, It's Far From Logical. I've, Recently, Had The Pleasure Of Witnessing This Change (Or More So, Conformity) In Certain People; Where They've COMPLETELY Lost Sight Of Who They Are, && Have Instead Focused On Who They WANT To Be. They've COMPLETELY Forgotten About Those Who've Helped Them Grow. Who've Supported Them. Who've Had Their Back.
So, My Words To Them: You've Officially Burned The Bridge That Led To Me, My Friendship, And My Support. You Reap What You Sow. And Anybody Else Who Has Witnessed This, I Encourage You To Say The Same To Those Who've "Forgotten" About You.
You Live Life With A Purpose. You Live Life To Be A Positive Attribute To Your Family, Your Community, YOUR World. You Live Life To ENCOURAGE, Not Degrade. To APPRECIATE. You Experience Life With Those That Are Deserving Of Sharing This Gift Of Life With You. Those That Aren't Are Meant To Live Their Life Without The Gift Of YOU.
I Close This In Saying, I've Come To This Realization Of Who I Am. My Growth Is Far From Done, And My Learning Continues. But Some Things I've Learned Thus Far Are:
1. I Can't Be Concerned With Others And What They're Doing With Their Lives. Nor SHOULD Others Be Concerned With Mine.
2. Beauty Is The Exact Opposite Of What Is Defined As Today. ESPECIALLY, Here At Howard University.
3. Those That Don't Appreciate Me, Don't DESERVE Me. Thus, A Farewell To All Things Between Me And Those Persons, Past And Present, Is Necessary.
4. Remember Who And What I Was RAISED To Be. Remember The Values Instilled IN Me.
5. That I Am Deserving. And OTHERS Are As Well.
I Wish That Others My Age Would Realize The Same...And Especially The Latter.
Forever Changing,
Chardae` A. Williams
i loved this post lil mama.
ReplyDelete& you are BEAUTIFUL in my eyess :)